just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
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