party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
