I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
