Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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