i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I got inside last night via doggy door
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
