that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
