I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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