why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Randomize