You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
