We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
