isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
