He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize