Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
