her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
