Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize