She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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