He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
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