Say something about gay babies.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
