on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I think my moral compass just broke
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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