I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Randomize
