My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
