I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Randomize
