They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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