But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize