A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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