SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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