i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
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