i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Randomize
