you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
