you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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