Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
