Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
i need some magic done to my vagina
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
