Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
