THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
i think i have herpe
just one?
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
