There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Randomize
