There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
so that wasnt chicken after all
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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