there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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