I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
It was like giving head to a cactus.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
