Sry I called you an 8
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize