WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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