You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Randomize