I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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