Can Purell be used as lube?
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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