oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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