Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Hippo gnu deer
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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