So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
