we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize