meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
