I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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