honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
