yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
